illgivethattoyou:

a relative at every family gathering: why no boyfriend?

what i want to say: the reality of being in an actual romantic relationship is actually terrifying and i’m much more comfortable entertaining the idea of having a boyfriend than actually getting one like there’s a 99.9% chance that i’ll be disappointed probably because i’ve idealized the concept in my head and my instinct to run away from intimacy combined with my high standards is a recipe for an emotional disaster and also my freedom holy shit i love my freedom and i take no shit and will drop your ass if you hurt me and i have dreams that don’t involve boys and i don’t want to waste my time on something that isn’t endgame for me like dating isn’t fun for me at all i don’t understand and i mean can you imagine bearing your soul to a person who has the power to destroy you like wHY THE FUCK—

what i always say: idk i’m just focusing on school