shortviolet:

most iconic things shane madej has said in buzzfeed unsolved 

  •  “yeah, that rings a bell or two, that shakes a tambourine.” 
  • “let me spin you a yarn, that you shan’t soon forget. I’m being eaten alive by crabs right now.” 
  • “I’M STRAAAANGE, AND OFF-PUTTING !” 
  • “I’m disrespectful, but I’m talking to dust and cobwebs.” 
  • “HOW DARE YOU DISPOSE OF MY BODY” 
  • “Cops in the 70s were like, oh you just killed someone ? You got 20 bucks ?” 
  • Everything he said on Goatman’s Bridge. 
  • *imitating a man claiming to be D.B Cooper on his deathbed* “I have something to tell you…… I’m the phantom of the skyyyyyyy” 
  • *laying down on a pentagram* “ROCK N ROLL, BUCKAROO” 
  • “Look I’m not here as a doctor. I just wanna see some of this crazy shit.” 
  • “You better watch out or Yankee Jim will give you some taffy. Some folks say they hear him playing a jolly little kazoo tune in the middle of the night.” 

beyoncepatronus:

i envy people who have dreams with clear rational plots like “i was on my favourite tv show for a day” my dreams are like i’m in a diner and i’m pregnant. i leave the diner and i’m in a forest watching the pregnant woman who is no longer me. she turns around and now we’re in a jeep and she’s my dad. we’re listening to music which is somehow numbers. he asks if i remember the time we went to pakistan and i say yeah because i do. i wake up and remember i’ve never been to pakistan in my life.